


Please

by Brolinismerthur



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: M/M, Magic Reveal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-26
Updated: 2013-02-26
Packaged: 2017-12-03 17:26:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/700816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brolinismerthur/pseuds/Brolinismerthur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The dreaded day has come and its everything Merlin hoped it wouldn't be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Please

"Arthur," Merlin stares at the back of his King's form. He's standing by the window, gazing out into the night. The moonlight shining through the glass turns his skin pale and his blue eyes into crystals.  
Merlin holds on to the bed post for balance. Leaning on it as the weight of his deepest secret fills the room.  
"Please," Merlin's voice is raspy, his throat dry. "Say something?" He begs on the verge of tears.  
Still there is silence from his King.  
It feels like years. Standing, staring, pleading with silence.  
"Go."  
Merlin inhales a shaky breath, blinks away the tears that now blur his vision. His hand reaches out instinctively for Arthur, but knows better than to touch.  
"Arthur," he begins.  
"I said go, Merl-" his name gets caught in his throat; he sighs.  
Merlin clutches his chest.  
Through the years he has suffered so much heart ache, but none ever as painful as this. The man he stood by all these years. The man he loves.  
Hates him.  
His legs won't move. He's petrified with fear that if he leaves, if he doesn't explain or apologize, he will never see his King -his love- again.  
"I'm sorry," he whispers. His voice so small, he could barely hear himself.  
"Just go."  
Merlin sniffles, holds back his sob and turns to leave. He glances around the room he once called home. At Arthur's bed, where they would make love through the night. And at Arthur. One last look and the door shuts behind him.

The man he knew -the _Merlin_ he knew- was all a lie. He's fuming with rage, but most of all he's hurt.  
How could he lie to, Arthur? How could he lie to his face every day and every night, knowing full well how Arthur feels about magic?  
I guess that's why he lied in the first place.  
Arthur never suspected a thing. He finally found the love worth fighting for and cherishing. And now?  
His mother! His father!  
Everyone he's ever loved has been corrupted by the pure evil that is magic.  
"No," he shakes his head, trying to shake away the thought of Merlin turning into what Morgana has become.  
Tears blur the night sky.  
"Not him. Please not-" he sobs into his hands.  
Arthur hasn't cried since his father's death. 

Merlin's limbs have a conscious of their own. They move him down the familiar stairs and through hallways, until he is out in the forest.  
He walks deep into the woods. The cool night air stinging his wet cheeks. The burn in his lungs intensifies as he makes his way, further still.  
His body is numb. His mind, clear of all thoughts. His heart, in pieces. His life in Camelot is over.  
He heads for Ealdor. 

The sun shines through the windows as if the events if last night never happened.  
Arthur stares at the dust that flickers in the beams.  
He didn't sleep.  
He sat in his chair, at his desk, and stared at the empty bed in front of him. 

His jacket did little to keep him warm, the fire he made had gone out hours ago. Through the leaves, the sun shines, as the dancing shadows mock his misery. 

There is a knock at his door.  
"Enter," he calls, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.  
"Sire?"  
It's Gaius.  
"Yes?"  
"I was wondering," the old man looks about the room, "have you seen Merlin?"  
The mention of his name has Arthur's stomach turning.  
"He's not with you?" He asks out of habit of worry.  
Gaius knows about them. That, every now and then, Merlin would stay the night in the King's chambers. He didn't worry when he knew where Merlin would be.  
"Its been three days and Merlin usually checks in with me," he explains.  
Three days.  
Three days since Merlin told Arthur about his secret.  
Three days since Arthur told him to leave.  
Three days since Arthur felt anything but numb. 

"Eat," his mother says as she places a bowl of porridge in front of him.  
He says nothing, only pokes at the mush with his spoon.  
"My darling boy," she coos as she takes a seat next to him. Running her fingers through his hair, she turns his head to face her. "You're home now."  
Tears fill his eyes and he sobs into her shoulder. She hugs him, rocks him like she did when he was a child.  
He hasn't stopped crying since he arrived in Ealdor, two days ago.  
He cries until there are no more tears left in him. Then he sleeps.  
On the third day, he wakes with a pain in his chest. He forgot to say goodbye to Gaius. 

That night, Arthur has a dream. A dream, reliving all of his battles. All the magical beasts he's slain. All the people he saved. Always with Merlin by his side.  
But in his dreams, he isn't the one who saves the day.  
It's Merlin.  
Merlin throwing the spear right at the heart of the beast with a nod of his head. Merlin creating a tornado of wind with the raise of his hand. Merlin bringing down the roof above Morgana with a flicker of gold in his eyes.  
Merlin.  
Always Merlin. 

He wakes to find the house empty. His mother probably went off to do her chores and let him sleep.  
But when he hears voices outside his window, he knows something is wrong.  
Stepping outside he sees the villagers gathered, pointing to the horizon.  
He shields his eyes from the sun and focuses on the hill that they are pointing to.  
Horses. Two of them, ride down toward Ealdor.  
The riders are wearing the familiar Pendragon red.  
Merlin's stomach drops to his feet and his heartbeat quickens.  
They've come to take me back and hang me for practicing magic, he thinks.  
Quickly he finds his mother. Her eyes are wide with worry.  
He pulls her into the house and holds her by the shoulders.  
"I have to with them, mum," he accepts his fate.  
"No," a tear rolls down her cheek. "I'm not going to lose you, again."  
He brings her into a hug. "I love you," he whispers into her hair.  
She clutching him with all her might, "I won't let you."  
"I love you," he repeats and presses a soft kiss to her temple. His eyes beg her to let him go.  
"My darling boy," she sobs. "I love you."  
Merlin straightens his back and walks out the door. 

"He was there, sire, just like you said," says Sir Leon.  
"And where is he now?" Arthur questions. A hint of panic in his voice.  
"Coming up the steps."

Arthur braces himself in his chair.  
It's been a week since they last saw each other. Since Merlin, last saw him. 

Merlin enters the room, staring down at the ground with his fist balled at his side.  
"Leave us," Arthur commands Sir Leon.  
When the door closes and they are left alone, neither of them say anything.  
Arthur closes his eyes, takes a deep breath and exhales slowly.  
"Merlin," he hasn't said his name in five days.  
"Go on, then," merlin spits at the floor.  
Arthur's brow furrows in confusion.  
"'Go on, then,' what?" He spits back. Not sure what Merlin is thinking.  
"Go on," Merlin's eyes are icy blue, filled with pain, regret, anger, uncertainty. "Lock me in the dungeons. Or better yet, hang me now. Get it over with." He's shaking, but whether its from anger or fear, Arthur has no idea.  
Arthur doesn't know what to say to that. He just stares at Merlin with wide eyes and slack jaw.  
"You think I brought you back to _kill_ you?"  
Merlin's eyes soften at the disbelief in Arthur's tone.  
"If not that, then why?"  
"To apologize," Arthur admits softly as he rises from his chair.  
Merlin watches his movements. The tentative steps toward him, the quivering of his hands, the quick rise and fall of his chest as his breath becomes faster.  
Merlin's breaths sync to Arthur's.  
The candle light produces a warm glow around his form. His golden hair shimmering with the flames. He is just as Merlin remembers him.  
"I had a dream," says his King.  
Merlin meets his eyes. Familiar and bright.  
"I dreamed that it was you." He's a step away from being toe to toe with Merlin.  
"That it was you, who saved me."  
Step.  
"You saved my life, Merlin," his breath is warm on Merlin's cheek.  
"Every time."  
Merlin closes his eyes and bites his lip.  
"With your magic."  
Is this really happening? Is Arthur accepting him and his magic? Is Arthur really this close to him?  
"I'm sorry," he whispers into the space between them. Arthur looks up at Merlin as if begging him to forgive _him_.  
"You did nothing wrong," the warlock shakes his head.  
Arthur breathes a laugh.  
"I did everything wrong." He reaches out for Merlin's hand.  
Merlin draws back.  
Arthur retracts his hand and blinks.  
They stare at each other, unsure what to do.  
Then merlin looks down at Arthur's hands, caresses his wrist with the pad of his finger, tentatively.  
"I should have told you."  
"Shh," Arthur Arthur leans in, closing the space between them. "You had to keep it hidden. I know that now."  
"Even after everything? Your fath-"  
"I'm not my father."  
They blink at each other for a few moments. Letting world around them move and sway as they stand, hands in hands, looking into each other's eyes.  
"You're not like any man I've ever known," Arthur breaks the silence.  
Merlin smiles. He brings them closer, leaning their foreheads together.  
"Maybe because I have magic?"  
"Sass, Merlin," Arthur warns.  
They both laugh and all seems right again.  
The King and his Warlock.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it.


End file.
